Afterthoughts

So, three days since and in, my first observations and impressions:

1) Those who say they don't need a piece of paper to feel married -- one of whom long ago included me -- don't understand a crucial thing: It's the process that makes the difference, not the paper. Going through it changes you, or at least it has me. I feel different about me and Carole as a couple. We were together before, but we weren't truly a couple. There really is something about proclaiming those vows before witnesses that squeezes out that little, final gap that remains between the engaged and makes them a unit by themselves. So no, you don't need a piece of paper. But you do need a wedding. Anyone who says differently hasn't gone through it to know.

2) After not having worn jewelry my entire life, I've gotten used to wearing a ring surprisingly quickly.

3) There are few things in life more emotionally satisfying than seeing old friends, or as especially in my case, old friends of mine who've never met each other, laughing and talking together.

4) There are few things more bittersweet than having to watch #3 from the sidelines. There just wasn't time to visit with everybody the way I wanted. But that's what future get-togethers are for.

5) I wish everyone had been able to hear the music that didn't have time to get played.

6) I suppose it's telling that I never got nervous about getting married itself. I got a little anxious about how the ceremony itself would go down, as the clouds darkened to the south and west, but it never occurred to me to get nervous about saying those words to Carole.

Still to come: A blow-by-blow account from both me and Carole about everything from the lead-up to the afterparty.

(Photos by Chase Lindley. Marc Eells' coming soon.)